Gharibat Dunyati...

BismiAllahi AlRahmani AlRaheem

I think I found a treasure. I found a notebook from long time ago that I used to write poetry in. I came across this one I wrote in arabic (notice, the arabic has plenty of mistakes) but sub7anaAllah, where did this come from....

Ka'Sayfu masaktu rou7i
Like a sword, I captured my soul

bayna yadayya mashdouda.
tightly held between my hands

wa gharistuha thaniyan dakhilan fee Ssadari
then I burried it again inside my chest.

Falahithtu El-hawa al-lati min zaman qati3tuha min jasadi.
then I breathed the breath that I once cut off...

Fatakallamat bi7azinin tufulati,
with sadness my childhood spoke

wa katibat bi-Dammi qsati:
with my blood it wrote my story


***


Illa liman fahimany, Lawhaton
A painting, to whom understood me

yarsumuni ka'dhababah bayna nasouj al'3ankabut nouqasi.
draws me like a fly struggling in a spider's web.

wa liman darisani, Qasidaton
A sonnet, to whom studied(examined) me

yaghinnouha bi'Ajmal la7non, tarta7ou a3ssabi.
sung in a beautiful tone that calms my mood...

lakin, liman karihani....Mousiqaton
However, Music I am to whom hates me

yarqisouha na3iman ila aakhir daqiqat qalbi
dances slowly to the last beats of my heart...


***


mashaytou mishwaran 7amila
I have walked a long way holding

kul a3sabi fawqa aktafi
everything on my shoulders

li kulli khatwa akhadhtuha
for every step that was taken

aqal dumu3 bakaytuha
less tears were cried...

li anni Ssabi7tu mu3tada li 7alati
because I became used to my happenings

falam tastati3u nutfat' amal tuqni3uni
Not even a drop of hope can revive me

***

Idha ghataytuha bi'ibtisama, Hazani,
if only I cover my sadness with a smile

Idha ghariqtu fi bi2r Al-sabr A3sabi
and if only I drown my feelings in well of Patience

Aftakirtu kullaha bil'waqt tamur
I thought with time it will pass

ma'ladhy dakhilani Istahlakani
whatever is killing me inside.

famayyal al-mizan bi'kuthratuha
but its abundance tipped my scale

Fakayidly mazbut qarari
Thus, reasoned the decision I have made..
***


Fi Aakhir daqiqat li malaki
At the last minute that I still possessed

najizat bayna 3aynaya mustaqbili
my future revealed itself between my eyes

asmi kal'burhan fi tafkiruhu tughly
my name like a volcano, in his thoughts.. raging

kal'mas bayn sudruhu hafidhuni
like a diamond in between his chest... protected

huwa l'wa7id faza al'7arbu li'qalbi
The only one that won the battle of my heart

lamma astaslam 7obbohu shafa l'madhi
when he bestowed his love, it healed the past

***

ABADAN!!! arfidhu an adhuqu ta3mun hilwan
NEVER!!! I refuse to taste something so sweet

idha 7a'yata7awal sammoun fi fami
if it will alter to venum in my mouth

ya wayli innu khanatni 3ayni
woe to me, My eyes have fooled me

lastu ro2yatun shuftuha illa khayali
It was not the future I saw, only my lost hopes

lakin al-daqiqatun intahat..
However, the minute has ended

fa Gharibat Dunya min 7awlaha 3eini.
And my world settled from my eyes.